Ivy’s Immigration Story – Nairobi, Kenya to Dallas, Texas

Childhood

Ivy grew up surrounded by her extended family, in Kenya’s “very collectivist culture”. She remembers playing outside with the other kids, going around and knocking on everyone’s doors. She remembers Nairobi as “one of the most perfect places on earth”.

Her mother, like her grandmother, worked in a bank, but in 1995, when Ivy was five, her mother left to join some of Ivy’s uncles who were already in the United States.

From an early age, Ivy loved to sing and perform in front of a crowd. She dreamt of one day being a pop star.

“I could have sworn I was going to be the next Britney Spears!” (audio below)

Her grandmother bought Ivy a baby grand piano after her mother left, and as Ivy learned to play it, her dreams only grew bigger.

After leaving Africa, Ivy’s mom worked long hours in the US as a CNA (certified nurse assistant), trying to save up enough money to bring Ivy to Dallas. Ivy remembers going around, telling everyone that she was going to America to be with her mom. Still, the first time she went to the US embassy to get a visa, it was denied. 

“I had to go back to school, and my friends were like, ‘I thought you were going to America!?’

United States

On the second try, Ivy got the visa. On December 31st, 1999 – just hours before Y2K – Ivy arrived in the US. She remembers thinking, “If the world ends, at least I’m in America.” Ivy was nine years old and especially excited about McDonald’s.

At her new elementary school in North Dallas, the administration assumed that as an African, Ivy wouldn’t speak English. From that moment on, Ivy felt like she had to always prove herself, and dispel all of the negative assumptions and stereotypes. The other kids in her class had so many questions for her – questions she thinks came from “genuine honesty.” 

‘In Africa did you have a house? Did you live in a grass hut?’”(audio below)

Ivy remembers standing in front of the mirror, trying to lose her accent. She also remembers making her first ‘American’ friend Allison, someone she is still friends with today.

Mavs’ Ballkid

Three years after arriving, Ivy, age 12, saw a commercial on TV for “hoop camp.” This would be an opportunity to play the sport she had always watched in Kenya. After enjoying the basketball camp, Ivy applied to become a Dallas Mavericks’ Ballkid (the kid who rebounds for the players and wipes the floor if a player falls). From the age of 12 until she was 18, she worked passionately as a Mavs’ Ballkid.

It wasn’t easy for Ivy’s mom to support the family. Rent was high in their neighborhood, but she wanted to live there because it had better school districts. While working as a CNA Ivy’s mom had cared for some alumni from a prestigious local private school called The Hockaday School. They told Ivy’s mom that she should apply for her daughter to go there, and one day Ivy came home to a Hockaday School uniform on her bed.

After attending The Hockaday School on financial aid, Ivy got a scholarship to study corporate communication at Marquette University in Wisconsin. She is extremely social, and her dorm room quickly became the “meeting spot.” Ivy says she’s always been “the person around whom people gather.” Marquette is where she met the father of her daughter, Kyani.

Poizon Ivy the DJ

While at Marquette, Ivy became the director of promotions at the college radio station. Part of the job was to host a radio show, but Ivy wanted to DJ instead of MC. She mentioned this to her friend Josh and the very next day, he showed up with two turntables, a mixer, a speaker, and introduced her to DJing. Ivy only planned on DJing for her radio show, but three months later, she was doing a show in front of 25,000 people and truly morphing into Poizon Ivy the DJ.

“It’s almost like DJing chose me. I didn’t choose it. That’s why to this day; I believe experience is the best teacher.”

Kyani Rose

Ivy’s daughter, Kyani Rose, is named after Ivy’s grandmother. Ivy says it’s hard to remember life before having Kyani in 2012. 

Above: Kyani wanting to put on her princess dress before going to the basketball game

“It’s like God allows you to erase everything you knew before. It’s like she is my little best friend. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

Home

Ivy always figured that she would move back to Dallas eventually. When she and Kyani’s father split up in 2015, Ivy and Kyani moved back to Texas to live with her mom.

“Dallas is Southern hospitality at its finest. I’ve seen more diverse cities, but you can find your place here.” 

Before moving back to Dallas, Ivy had had the opportunity to tour as the DJ for WNBA player Skylar Diggins‘s basketball camp. This experience got her thinking about DJing in bigger sports venues. In 2016, Ivy decided to cold call the WNBA’s Dallas Wings’ office, and it worked. She was hired on as their DJ. With confidence high, Ivy decided to email the NBA’s Dallas Mavericks and see if she could DJ for them as well. She knew it was a longshot, as the NBA had only ever had one female DJ, but the Mavs’ CMO remembered her from her years as a Mavs’ Ballkid, and the team happened to be looking for a DJ.

“In the interview, I told them I grew up in this building, and I know what it is supposed to sound like.” (audio below)

Ivy became the second-ever female DJ in the NBA. It was her goal from the start to ascend through the ranks from basketball camps to DJing the NBA All-Star Weekend, and in 2018 she was, in fact, the DJ on All-Star Sunday.

 “I was the first woman ever to do that. Another check off the list. Next: Team USA, Olympics, and then I’ll be done!”

Love

Since Kyani was born, every decision Ivy makes includes the question, “How will this affect my daughter?” DJing consumes Ivy “emotionally, physically and spiritually”. She often brings Kyani with her to work because some weeks, that is the only time she can see her. 

“I feel like if she’s around me, I’m able to influence her. I look at her and I know I only have one chance to get this right. It’s the most beautiful thing ever.” (audio below)

Ivy tries her best to hide her life’s stresses from Kyani.

“I’m so stressed out, and she’s the one I’m around the most. I don’t want her to be a punching bag of sorts. At the end of everything is Kyani, and at the beginning of everything is Kyani.”

Ivy thinks more people should talk openly about the challenges of motherhood. She knows firsthand how lonely and challenging life can be as a single mother.

People ask Ivy all the time if DJing is her “full-time job”. Since she was 21, DJing is the only job Ivy has ever had.

“It’s how I have to provide for Kyani and myself for the rest of our lives. I don’t know where I would be without it.”

Game Time

When Ivy is DJing a Mavs game, the first thing she does is look over the game script and prepare the music. The “hotkeys” need to be programmed for things like the kiss cam, marriage proposals, and any other moments requiring a sound effect.

“I have to watch more basketball than I care to. I literally control the pace of this game. The energy derives from the sound.”

Audio: Announcing birthdays at the game

Ivy jokes about what it would be like if she didn’t show up to work one day, and everyone had a silent basketball game!

Friends

When Ivy was a Ballkid, she got to know the Mavs ManiAACs, a group of large men who dance and entertain the crowd during the games. “Big Rob” from Louisiana, has been a ManiAAC for almost two decades and has known Ivy since childhood.

“I’m so proud of her on so many levels. Coming up as a Ballkid, to being the only African American female DJ in the whole NBA – that’s a huge accomplishment, and she’s just starting!” (audio below)

Erin [the above photo top right], the Mavs Vice President, Corporate Communications and Events, comments on how, many people, come to the games to see Ivy. It’s normal to see fans coming up to Ivy for a big hug.  

“She has her own fandom and a huge social media following. Where music and sports meet is where she sits, and it is awesome!”

Above: Ivy saying hi to friends at the game

One fan named Gary [see the photo above left] from Indianapolis has been a season ticket holder since 1985 and is a big DJ Poizon Ivy fan.

“I can tell you that Poizon puts a really nice vibe in the arena. She’s putting her own stamp on it, and it’s great to have her here.” (audio below)

Above: Ivy posing for a selfie with a fan from the opposing team

Africa

Ivy knows her influence goes farther than the United States. She wants to have an impact on Africa and tries to return to her home continent as often as possible. 

“I get so many messages that say: ‘girls in Kenya need to know about you! You were born here just like them – they can relate. You come from where they come from – walked the same streets.’ You have to push stuff out there to be that hope or beam of light for someone.”

Ivy recently got a message from her former kindergarten teacher saying that she had named her child Ivy after her.

“I’m being very intentional in connecting everything I do now to Kenya. My life can be most meaningful if I find a way to impact Kenya too.”

It is very important to Ivy that Kyani experiences and understands Kenya and is exposed to other ways of life, which is why she has already brought her to Africa twice.

“It is important for her to go there and see that we are very fortunate to have this life, but at the same time, things are happening over there that we don’t have here. Very often, the light isn’t shed both ways.”

Above: DJ Poizon Ivy being introduced at the American Airlines Center

Music

Ivy can’t imagine a world without sound. It is the sense she cherishes most. 

“It’s the one thing in my life that I don’t think I’d be able to conquer. There is so much music in the world. It is a universal language, a unifier – it heals and soothes.” (audio below)

Ivy currently DJs at a local Dallas radio station K104 as well as at the Mavs & Wings games. Ivy loves her job. Sometimes she does wish though that people focused more on her as a DJ as opposed to a female DJ. (audio below)

Future

Every day, as she drives to and from work, Ivy sees people in Dallas who are struggling socio-economically. She’s trying to figure out how best to use her platform to benefit those who are less fortunate, in the US and in Africa.

“The world is at a weird dark place right now. I hope we will see a world where people are truly equal.”

Ivy’s grandpa, who she was only able to meet once before he died, was a politician. Ivy hasn’t ruled out the possibility of getting into politics or becoming the first female commissioner of the NBA.

#FINDINGAMERICAN

To receive updates on the book release and exhibition of “Finding American: Stories of Immigration from all 50 States” please subscribe here. This project is a labor of love and passion. If you would like to support its continuation, it would be greatly appreciated!

© Photos and text by Colin Boyd Shafer | Edited by Kate Kamo McHugh. Quotes edited for clarity and brevity.

Dhamarys’s Immigration Story – Luperon, the Dominican Republic to Providence, Rhode Island

Dhamarys’s father came to the United States in 1981. He had been married before, and his daughter from his previous marriage helped him get a green card. He didn’t like the United States and ended up returning to the Dominican Republic in 1983. Dhamarys’s father has a total of 11 children, and four of them were with his second wife, Dhamarys’s mother.

Childhood

Dhamarys was born in Luperon, and when she was three months old, they moved to the capital, Santo Domingo. She had a happy childhood – one where “everybody in the neighborhood was like family.” She remembers how at Christmas time, they would cut the leaves off palm trees to make walls and close the street down to have a giant dance party. 

Above: Dhamarys [on the left] in the DR with her mother, three siblings and three cousins

United States

Dhamarys grew up dreaming of going to the United States, specifically New York. 

“Everybody wanted to go to New York. It was called New York, not the United States!” 

Dhamarys’s father always said he would never return to the US, but eventually, her mom convinced him otherwise and he left for New York City in 1984. He worked nonstop and it took three years before he completed the immigration process for Dhamarys’s mother and their four children. In 1987, when she was 19, Dhamarys, her mother, and her three younger siblings, all moved to the US. It wasn’t an ideal time. She was leaving her dog and a fiancé behind in the Dominican Republic. She was supposed to return for her marriage after three months, but that never happened. (audio below)

Above: Dhamarys’s Dominican voter ID photo, age 18

When her father was in the US without the rest of the family, he was working at New York City’s Four Seasons Hotel, working as a dishwasher. Before they joined him in the US, he decided that he didn’t want his children to grow up in NYC. Another dishwasher told Dhamarys’s father of a cousin in Rhode Island who could help the family get set up there. Her father trusted this man, so he rented a U-haul, bought a map, and the family headed for Providence, Rhode Island. The dishwasher’s connection had left keys in the apartment mailbox. They arrived and unpacked everything into the one-bedroom apartment. Dhamarys remembers it being so cold. 

“We knew we had to stick together to survive.”

Survival

The next day at eight in the morning, someone knocked on their door. It was a tall man who was speaking English rapidly, and the family couldn’t understand what he was saying. He left and came back two hours later with a police officer who spoke Spanish. 

“You have 24 hours to leave this apartment.” 

Their connection, who said they could stay there, was himself a renter, and the lease was only for a single occupant. The tall man at the door who spoke English was the actual owner. Desperate, they found another apartment in “the worst part of Providence.” The tenants in the first-floor apartments were drug dealers, and their third-floor apartment was undergoing renovations. There was no furniture, no kitchen, and no heat – they had a mattress on the floor, and they managed to get a little space heater. After a few weeks, the renovations finished, and they started getting settled.

Within two weeks of arriving in Rhode Island, Dhamarys, her parents, and 14-year-old brother Raul started working. They would walk three miles every day to work in the same electronics factory assembling computer parts. Dhamarys’s younger siblings: Luisa, ten, and Nathalie, eight, started school. She was amazed at how quickly they picked up English. 

“I was jealous as I couldn’t go to school. I just had to work to help my family.”

She will never forget the day her mother asked her to leave the factory at lunch to buy eggs. She tried to ask the man at the supermarket for “huevos”, but he didn’t understand her. Next, she tried making chicken sounds, but he thought she wanted to buy a whole chicken! One of her coworkers happened to have been at the supermarket and overheard everything. Dhamarys finally got the eggs, and by the time she got back, her coworkers at the factory were all laughing and clucking like chickens. (audio below)

Nursing

Her father never stopped reminding Dhamarys that she needed to go back to school. Eventually, she left the factory, started working at a gas station, and enrolled in classes to become a nursing assistant.

There was one woman who always came to the gas station to buy cigarettes. Dhamarys kept noticing her badge and eventually found out she worked at the Women & Infants Hospital. She told the woman that one day she is going to be a nurse there too. Dhamarys signed up for CNA (certified nurses assistant) classes, passed, and got her license in 1992. She worked first at a nursing home, then applied, and just like she told that woman in the gas station, Dhamarys started working at the hospital in 1994. She felt so proud walking into that same gas station wearing her badge. (audio below)

In 2008 Dhmarys graduated from nursing school with an associate’s degree, and in 2014 she went back to get her Bachelor of Science in Nursing at the University of Rhode Island. Dhamarys couldn’t have done it without the Women & Infants Hospital financially supporting her degree. Dhamarys only took one class at a time because she was working forty-hour weeks, but in 2017 she graduated as a Registered Nurse.

While earning her nursing degree, Dhamarys had the opportunity to substitute a class for a trip to help people in Haiti [see the photo above]. As a nursing student in 2015, she went to remote places to provide free healthcare to communities in need. Dhamarys has continued going to volunteer in the Dominican Republic. Even though now it costs her money to volunteer, she thinks it’s worth it. 

“They take you to the poor, poor places, and it is so rewarding. They appreciate it so much. Every year I put signs in the Women & Infants Hospital and collect stuff like medicine. I love to go. It’s very rewarding to give back to your country.”

Not only is Dhamarys working as a nurse at the hospital, but in 2017 she picked up a part-time job at the airport. She has always loved to travel, but could never afford it. Now she can fly for free. When she went for the interview, they asked her why she would want a job inspecting food carts, when she is already working as a nurse. Her response was, “Because I want to fly. I’m not gonna lie to you!”

Above: Dhamarys standing on Broad Street with the street lines painted like the flag of the Dominican Republic

Rhode Island

Dhamarys loves Rhode Island. She loves the people, the beautiful Atlantic Ocean, and the superb seafood. 

“It may be the smallest state, but there is a lot to do here. Any culture you can think of, we have it here. I don’t think I will ever move out of Rhode Island.” (audio below)

Most of Dhamarys’s friends in the US are Dominicans. There is a street in Providence called Broad Street that is like a “little Dominican Republic”. According to Dhamarys, it’s where you can find some of the best Dominican food in the United States. She doesn’t follow politics in the DR, but says, “culture-wise I follow the Dominicans.”

Above: Dhamarys at the Juan Pablo Duarte (Founding Father of the Dominican Republic) memorial in Roger Williams Park, Providence

Language

Dhamarys’s language ability and her accent is something she is very conscious of all the time. Studying in English has always been extremely hard for her. 

“Something that you can read one time and understand, I have to read five times.”

Dhamarys finds it hard to pronounce many English words and says she appreciates it when people correct her pronunciation. She has never experienced discrimination because of her accent, but it still makes her self-conscious. 

“I have a very strong accent. I worry about it all the time. That’s why I don’t like to speak. I always feel very uncomfortable.”

In order to complete her Nursing degree, Dhamarys had to take a communication class and give a presentation. Nothing makes her more nervous than public speaking. 

“One of the girls in class says, ‘take an Ativan.’ I said, ‘oh, would that make me calm down?’, and she said ‘yes’ and gave it to me. Let me tell you; my accent wasn’t the problem; the problem was I couldn’t speak!” (audio below)

Parenting

Dhamarys’s entire family lives in the United States now. She has two children. Her son is a sheriff patrol officer in Florida and her daughter just started high school in Rhode Island and hopes to be a nurse anesthesiologist.

When Dhamarys’s son comes home to visit, they go out to the club together with all of his friends.

“My son always says, ‘my friends are asking for you,’ and I say, ‘That’s because I’m young, baby!’” (audio below)

Dhamarys has her daughter every other week. When she does, her parents pick her up from school each day, then Dhamarys joins them after work for dinner. Dhamarys jokes that the kitchen in her house “is just for decoration.” Dhamarys tries to include her parents in everything she does. She recently took them on a surprise cruise and they all had a blast. 

“My parents are so good to me. I am the oldest, and I feel like I am the favorite.”

When she has free time on the weekends, Dhamarys loves to dance the Bachata. (audio below)

Future

Dhamarys’ dream is to retire at 59 and travel. The only problem with this plan is that she loves her job at the hospital, so she’s not sure how she could give it up. No matter what happens in the future, Dhamarys continues to have a joy for life that is infectious. 

“I try to be positive. Everything is difficult in life, but if you have a negative mind, it is more difficult. I feel that people are more willing to help you if you don’t complain about things. It has worked for me.” (audio below)

*Update: Since the interview, Dhamarys started selling real estate, and in 2019 she was awarded the “Hospital Hero” at Women and Infants Hospital.

#FINDINGAMERICAN

To receive updates on the book release and exhibition of “Finding American: Stories of Immigration from all 50 States” please subscribe here. This project is a labor of love and passion. If you would like to support its continuation, it would be greatly appreciated!

© Photos and text by Colin Boyd Shafer | Edited by Kate Kamo McHugh. Quotes have been edited for clarity and brevity.

Thierry’s Immigration Story – Le Mans, France to Pasadena, California

Le Mans

Thierry was born ten weeks early in Le Mans, while his parents were visiting his grandparents, but raised in a suburb outside Paris. To keep it simple, when people ask where he is from, Thierry tells them Paris. 

Once a year, Thierry and his three siblings would visit one set of grandparents in Le Mans and the others in Les Vosges. The maternal grandparents in Les Vosges had a farm, and he loved picking blueberries there. It was the same farm his mom and her eleven siblings grew up on and were fed by. He considers himself lucky to have had a “boring happy childhood”. He started going to sleepaway “holiday camps” in the summer at age five and bicycling to school alone when he was only six. His parents encouraged his independence. 

Thierry’s mom worked in management for French telecommunications, and his dad worked for Air France. He actually started with the company as a carpenter, at a time when planes contained wood! The perk of his job was that the family could travel a lot. They weren’t wealthy but were never in need of anything. 

“I guess because I was flying all the time, I didn’t feel like borders were a thing. I always felt like I could take a plane and be somewhere else.”

Canada

At 18 Thierry moved to Quebec to go to university and be with his first girlfriend, a Canadian. Despite how Canada is commonly perceived, Thierry didn’t find Canada to be as welcoming a place. He also found it unusual that he had to do a French test – and barely passed with a 60% – even though he is from France!

It was in Canada while studying that he started developing an interest in photography.  Thierry’s first photographs were landscapes inspired by Canada’s natural beauty. Thierry got a “real camera” and attempted some portraits. The first portrait he felt looked professional was of a little child he spotted looking out the window when he was at his brother’s wedding in the South of France [see the photo below].

When he was 20, Thierry and his Canadian girlfriend broke up. All of his friends in Canada were connected to his ex-girlfriend, so he decided it was best to move back to France. For the next five years, he lived in Paris, researching in a lab, pursuing a Ph.D. in cancer research. The fact that his father was battling cancer heightened his passion for the field. Sadly, all of this time in a lab meant less time with his father who was dying. He found it hard to stand the 60 hours a week inside in a lab environment and was happy when it was over. At age 25, with a Ph.D. in cancer research, Thierry decided to switch careers and become a photographer.

Photography

Thierry already spent so much of his free time on photography and wanted to see if he could make a career of it. After his father passed away Thierry left France and traveled with his camera to Brazil, Thailand, Morocco, Japan, China, and even spent a few months traveling in the US. The first time he went to Los Angeles, he fell in love with the weather and the people. He also thought it was the perfect place for him to work as a photographer.

“I knew there was something different for me in this city. It was the place to be for me. I felt very stuck in France. I knew it would be a challenge because everyone is a photographer or model here.”

Above: Thierry’s father was particularly fond of Russian cameras. Thierry found this one in Thailand, as it felt like something his father would have used had he been a photographer. 

Thierry can’t see himself in any other career – photography is his way of expressing himself. Thierry’s late father always loved photography. Thierry knows that his father would have loved to be a professional photographer. For someone who started working as a carpenter at 14, it simply wasn’t a realistic career option.

“I feel like photography is a mission, not only for me but for my father, to do what he would have loved to do. I hope he is proud of what I am doing.” (audio below)

Scientific Approach

Thierry feels like, in a roundabout way, his studies in the sciences are useful for his work as a photographer.  

“I still have the scientific approach – trial and error, and statistics. The way I photograph, I think about the physics of it. A lot of people take photos in a very experimental way. I think in many ways, my knowledge of physics allows me to do a little less trial and error.” (audio below)

All those years studying and researching for his Ph.D. taught Thierry discipline, a quality he believes he needs as an artist trying to live from his craft.

Above: Young Thierry dressed as a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

Misconceptions

Thierry has found that Americans often think the French hate them, and if you go to France, you shouldn’t mention you are American. He thinks this is wrong.

“We fantasize about the US, like how the Americans fantasize about France.”  

A lot of the French TV shows he watched during his childhood were just reproductions of American shows. The French government had to create laws making it mandatory that radio stations play a certain quota of French music or else it would be all American. Thierry believes that if a company is “American,” it will succeed in France. 

“Even though Starbucks is the worst coffee, it’s American, so people in France go there. We have much better coffee in Europe than that, but it works. There is a fascination about America, and I think it comes from after WWII they were seen as our savior.” (audio below)

Despite this fascination, Thierry never imagined himself living in the US.

California

When Thierry first moved to the US in 2014, he moved to Orange County, California. In 2017 he moved to Pasadena, a city northeast of downtown Los Angeles. Thierry thinks LA is a city you either love or you hate, and having a normal job is anything but a nine to five. He also thinks it is a place where if you are good at what you do, you can succeed. 

“What I like here compared to France is that if you are good, people will give you a chance. In France, they like what you are doing but they already have a photographer. People aren’t willing to change unless there is a major problem like the photographer died or he’s blind. People here are more open to change and to try and experiment. It is more performance-based. If you bring them more money, everything is good.”

Most people Thierry encounters in LA work in the entertainment industry, but most of them also need to supplement their artistic endeavors with another job like bartending.

“It’s very easy to get lost because a lot of people are doing five or six different things. There are so many distractions and events going on. It’s easy to be at events every day.”

Los Angeles is a city where people from outside the US, and people from inside the US, migrate. Thierry knows it is more diverse and open-minded than most places in America.

“In Temecula Valley, two hours from LA, I was doing a photoshoot and I made a wrong turn. I stopped to make a call on my cell phone and someone came out of their house with a shotgun. ‘Get off my property, or I’ll shoot!’” (audio below)

Relationships

Thierry and his ex-wife [see the photo above] didn’t meet on a set, even though she is a makeup artist, and he’s a photographer. A friend of a friend introduced them, thinking they would get along. Thierry knows that his career can be a challenge in any relationship. 

“It’s very hard to be a photographer and be in a relationship, no matter if your partner understands or not. Last year I did ten publications in Playboy [see the photo below]. It’s not necessarily easy being in a relationship when you do that.”

Daughter

In 2017 Thierry became a father. 

“I discovered what unconditional love is. With my daughter, I can’t even imagine, no matter what she does that I will not love her. There is this deep connection, and it changed my life.” (audio below)

Thierry reflected on his finances after having a daughter.

“I changed from whatever comes is good; to now, I need to make money and feed my kid. Before having my daughter, I would accept a lot of unpaid jobs. Since then, I have focused on my need to make an income.”

Photography an industry where people are always trying to push to pay you less. Thierry is invited regularly to events, where people think he will take photos and share them for free. Now he is straightforward about it; for his daughter’s sake – he needs to be paid.

“You don’t invite your dentist to your house and expect them to fix your teeth!” (audio below)

Green Card

Thierry’s green card came through marriage. He can’t believe the complexity of the process.

“There is no one that wants to move out of their country unless they have a very good reason for it. Either they are fleeing something, or they are aiming at something specific like me. It’s much more comfortable for someone to stay where they are. I don’t think that crazy strict regulations on immigration are a good thing. One of my hopes for the future is that emigrating will be easier, and ideally, borders would be a thing of the past.” (audio below)

Nutrition

Thierry loves cooking healthy natural foods. 

“After my dad passed, I started being very health conscious because I didn’t want to be on the same path. His cancer was very related to food. I think, for the most part, most cancers are related to lifestyle. Even things like smoking are not even close to being as bad as having bad eating habits.” (audio below)

Thierry wants his daughter to know where her food comes from. When he was young, he did. His grandparents were raising about 30 rabbits at any time, and that was the main meat they ate.

“I remember seeing the rabbit, playing with the rabbit, then you take a rabbit, you skin it and you eat it. To most people, it seems really rough, but to me, it made me appreciate it. I would never waste any meat because this was something that was living.” (audio below)

Future

Thierry is busy doing commercial photography, weddings, running a studio, working as a director of photography for TV shows, and he has even acted in a few. Despite all of this work, his number one priority is his daughter. 

Thierry feels a sense of duty to expose his daughter to as much of the world as possible. He believes a lot of the world’s problems stem from peoples’ lack of exposure and knowledge. Traveling and experiencing different cultures and ways of life was one way that Thierry thinks he became more empathetic to others. The more you travel, the more you realize that people have the same basic needs. 

“When you meet a family from a country you had a misconception about, you see that no matter what, they love their kids and would do anything for their kids. Anywhere you go, you will see that people love their kids and would do anything for them. My hope for the future is that we raise children that travel more and understand other cultures and are empathetic to others. I think that the new generation is more open. I’m hopeful for that.” 

Borderless World

Thierry likes to believe that we are moving towards a better world – that people are starting to see how “hard borders” are creating more problems than they are solving. It makes sense to Thierry that if it is incredibly hard to get from Mexico to the US, once someone does, they are going to stay because they paid so much money and went through so much trouble to migrate in the first place. If it were easier, like it was in the past, people would come and go, back and forth. (audio below)

Thierry believes that just because someone is born in a certain country, it shouldn’t give them any more right to be in that place. He dreams of a borderless world for his daughter’s future.

#FINDINGAMERICAN

To receive updates on the book release and exhibition of “Finding American: Stories of Immigration from all 50 States” please subscribe here. This project is a labor of love and passion. If you would like to support its continuation, it would be greatly appreciated!

© Photos and text by Colin Boyd Shafer | Edited by Kate Kamo McHugh. Quotes edited for clarity and brevity.

Mariya’s Immigration Story – Yaroslavl, Russia to Walnut Creek, California

Childhood

Mariya was born in 1990 in Yaroslavl, Russia – a large industrial city four hours from Moscow, famous for making rubber tires. Her father was finishing his Ph.D. and her mother was completing medical school, so it was her babushka (grandmother) who looked after Mariya.

It wasn’t easy for her parents to find jobs in Russia that fit their qualifications. Mariya’s mother was a doctor, but she ended up accepting a job at a blood bank. Her father was a software engineer but had to work two jobs plus teach at a university to make ends meet. Like many others, the post-Soviet era was a difficult economic time for her family. She remembers the uncertainty as to whether or not there would be bread available to buy. 

“The milk truck would come once a week, and my grandma would wait in a line at nine at night to get milk for the next morning. It was bad. It’s hard to relay the bare bones of life in Russia.” (audio below)

Once a year at Mariya’s preschool, they would do school pictures with a stuffed animal, and the girls had to wear a bow in their hair. Mariya didn’t have a bow because her parents couldn’t afford it, so she had to borrow one. (audio below)

In school, Mariya always tried to be the best – she knew education was important to her parents. She didn’t have any other dreams or ambitions, though. The mentality was, “just do what you have to do.” This thinking changed at nine years of age when Mariya and her baby brother moved to the US with their parents.

“When we got to America, that’s when my parents told me to have big dreams. I feel like that was the American way of thinking about the future.” (audio below)

United States

All of her ideas about America came from the TV. They had three channels, and only one American show called Charles in Charge

“There was a big house with a pool; everything was just so big and so beautiful. That was the only visual I had. I was going to move to the U.S. and have a big beautiful house and a big pool. Life was going to be great.”

In the late 1990s, many other families were leaving Russia for California and Silicon Valley’s technology boom. People in software engineering, like her father, were leaving Russia because of the lack of available jobs. She remembers being excited about her first plane ride.

When you’re young, you don’t understand the gravity of what you are about to do – literally, leave everything you know behind.  

In hindsight, she realizes how little her family knew about where they were going. 

We didn’t know the geography of where we were going. My dad used to say, ‘We are going to live in San Francisco, but I’m going to work in L.A.’ We thought the cities were right next to each other!” (audio below)

Mariya’s family left Russia with giant bags because they couldn’t afford suitcases and $100 cash from Mariya’s uncle. When they got to California in 1999, they borrowed money and moved into a Walnut Creek apartment. Walnut Creek, was an area where many other Russians immigrated to. It wasn’t the affluent place it is today. Their new apartment was on the second floor, and from the balcony, Mariya could see the complex’s pool and fountains.

 To me, it was like we were living in a resort; I had never seen anything like this in my life. 

Soon the novelty faded away, and Mariya, age nine, realized that life wasn’t going to be easy in the US. She was confused by how empty the streets were – “where are all the people?” In Russia, she walked or took public transportation. In America, she realized that everyone drives, and if you are going to walk somewhere, it will take you a long time.

Above: Mariya’s family’s first Christmas in California

Within a couple of days of arriving, Mariya started school. It was the spring, almost the end of the school year, but her parents still made her go. She had studied English in Russia a little, but it was British English. Instead of saying “mom” or “dad, Mariya said, “mother” and “father” (in a British accent). Mariya realized that the English she knew wasn’t going to help much. Mariya was lost.

“I was sitting there in class, not understanding anything that was happening. And then I would go home at night with homework that I was responsible for completing. At home, my mother and I would translate every single word with a dictionary.”

Mariya went from being a top student in Russia, to barely scraping by. She remembers crying to her mom, telling her that she wants to give up. Luckily, things got better over time. Looking back, she knows it was much easier for her than for her parents to transition to life in America since they knew no English at all.

Synchronized Swimming

In that first year of being in the US, Mariya brought home a flyer advertising a two-week crash course in synchronized swimming. Back in Russia, she had done swimming and gymnastics but had never tried “synchro.” Her mom thought it would be an excellent way for her to do something other than schoolwork, make friends, and practice her English. Mariya took the crash course, and when they asked her if she would like to do this year-round, she said “yes”!

“When you’re young, synchro is appealing because you’re swimming, but you are also dancing in sparkly suits and makeup. It combines a lot of aspects into one sport. You do gymnastics and acrobatics, you go upside down, and a lot is going on. I loved being in the water and doing something artistic.”

She was with the Walnut Creek Aquanuts from the end of elementary school to high school. With each passing year, she got better and more competitive. It was a financial strain on her parents, but they always supported her.

In her junior year of high school, Mariya became a US citizen, so she tried out for and made the US Junior National Team. As she neared the end of high school, Stanford University was her number one choice. Still, Mariya doubted that she would be accepted there. Luckily, being recruited as an athlete improved her chances, and she got in. While at university, Mariya started her career with the US National Team, and in 2012 she went to the Olympics in London.

Olympics

Above: The tattoo Mariya got after the 2012 Olympics

Mariya finds it hard to put into words the pride she felt representing the US. 

“In the Olympics, you feel like you are a part of something bigger. I’m not just in my little sport. The US Olympic & Paralympic Committee does an excellent job of creating camaraderie. I remember getting my first USA jacket and feeling so proud.” (audio below)

“The Olympics is like nothing you’ve ever experienced before as an athleteIt’s a crazy experience, but the most amazing experience I probably will ever have in my life. It’s the entire pinnacle of the work you’ve done your whole life. The pressure you feel is immense, even if you go into the Olympics knowing that you’re not going to get a medal. 

Mariya explains how in synchro, it’s like you are training your entire life, for only nine minutes of actually competing. The pressure of having the whole world watching is like nothing else. It is a struggle for many Olympic alumni because they will never be able to replicate that exhilaration and adrenaline ever again.

Above: Mariya’s license plate “PCHELKA” meaning “busy bee”

Russia has been the best in synchronized swimming for decades. When Mariya started synchro, she told her American coach that she wanted to swim for Russia someday. Legally, as a dual citizen, she could represent Russia, but deep down, she knew they were “light years” ahead of her. The training in the US isn’t what it is in Russia. She has never felt like it was a competition; instead, she is proud of Russia.

“I always felt pride listening to the Russian national anthem and watching the flag go up, but I also feel proud listening to the US national anthem. I was always even in my pride and allegiance, and it was hard for people to understand that. Their impressions seemed to sound like, ‘Well, you live here – you’re an American. How can you have allegiance to your old country?’” (audio below)

Mariya knows some immigrants abandon their culture when they come to the US and try to be as American as possible, but her family was never like that. They ate Russian food, spoke the Russian language, and she continued to be proud of her country of birth while representing the US. (audio below)

Returning to Russia to compete for Team USA was a special experience for Mariya.

“It was like coming home. When you walk out on deck they show your name and who you are competing for. When the Russian audience saw my name, which is clearly Russian, they all started cheering.” (audio below)

After her first Olympics in 2012, Mariya had one more year at Stanford and didn’t plan on returning to the Olympics again. After graduating, however, she started training and decided to try out for the National Team again. She was told she was too old to improve and needed to lose some weight – they would rather focus on younger teenage athletes. She felt insulted.

“Synchro being an aesthetic sport means that you’re always criticized. The pressure that comes with ballet, swimming, and gymnastics was strong. I am constantly criticized all day: ‘You’re doing this wrong – you’re doing that wrong. You also have to lose five pounds.  Are you sure you want to eat that?’” 

Her parents were okay with her retirement and figured it was a good time for her to get a real job and have an everyday life. Mariya, on the other hand, yearned for a second Olympic experience and would not give up. She returned to her home club in Walnut Creek to prepare for tryouts one last time. That next year at the national team trials, Mariya was the best swimmer there.

“You can’t keep someone off the team when they are number one!”  

A year later Mariya was going to the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.

“That was my redemption story. You told me you didn’t want me and I came back, made all the improvements, and proved you wrong.” (audio below)

After Synchro

The 2016 Olympics was a great way for Mariya to finish her career in synchro. In 2012, she finished 11th, and in 2016, they finished 9th. She was happy with the improvement and felt like she ended on a high. Throughout her synchro career, Mariya was always doing something outside of the pool. Towards the end, she was working part-time and finishing her Master’s of Sport Management at the University of San Francisco.

“My parents emphasized that I always had to have something to fall back on. There are tons of athletes that finish their athletic careers and have no education or work experience to fall back on.

Her family has now been in the US for more than two decades. Mariya is confident that it hasn’t been what her parents expected, but she knows they don’t regret coming. She also knows her parents had no idea their daughter would become a US Olympic athlete.

“Some parents push their kids towards the Olympian path, but my parents just wanted a better life for themselves and their kids.”

Many people are surprised to find out Mariya wasn’t born in the US. With all of the political issues in the news regarding the United States and Russia she overhears a lot of discussions, and finds it hard to keep quiet.

“It is interesting to hear people speak their true feelings about Russia when they don’t know I’m from there.” 

Audio: Mariya discussing the stereotypes Americans have about Russians
Above: Mariya, age six, and her parents, after going kayaking

Mariya appreciates that she lived in another country, and she wishes more Americans would have this experience. From the moment she arrived in the US, it bothered her how little Americans seemed to know about other countries, like Russia.

“Once you travel and meet different people you start to understand that the way things are here is not the way they are other places in the world” (audio below)

Future

Mariya is nervous about the relationship between the US and Russia. She knows the US media shows things one way, and the Russian media shows them another way. All Mariya wants to see is peace. She is a dual citizen, and she can remain one unless the two countries are at war. If they did ever go to war, she would need to choose.

Currently, Mariya works for Visa and coaches synchro. Mariya hopes that eventually, she can put her Master’s in Sports Management to use and work more closely with athletics – specifically the Olympics. In the not too distant future, she would like to get married and start a family.

“I feel like I got started later than everyone because of synchro.”

#FINDINGAMERICAN

To receive updates on the book release and exhibition of “Finding American: Stories of Immigration from all 50 States” please subscribe here. This project is a labor of love and passion. If you would like to support its continuation, it would be greatly appreciated!

© Photos and text by Colin Boyd Shafer | Edited by Kate Kamo McHugh. Quotes edited for clarity and brevity.

Eman’s Immigration Story – Kuwait City, Kuwait to NYC, New York

Childhood

Eman was born at the beginning of the 1980s to Palestinian parents living in Kuwait.

Most of Eman’s memories of Kuwait involve food. 

“We didn’t have McDonald’s when I grew up – we had Hardees. Pizza Hut is better there. It had an elaborate salad bar. The food was good in Kuwait because that is all we had. They have no other form of entertainment really.” (audio below)

Fleeing Kuwait

Eman was nine when they fled Kuwait in 1990 because of the Gulf War. Eman’s parents had already lived through war as Palestinians and they didn’t want their children experiencing the same trauma they had. The family drove overnight from Kuwait to Iraq. Eman remembers how her parents tried their best to pretend like everything was normal for her and her two younger siblings.

 We didn’t feel danger or that anything bad was happening. It’s a field trip – eat delicious food and listen to your favorite songs!

Oddly enough, the one thing Eman will never forget about Iraq is the milk. “It is the best milk I’ve ever had in my life.” Eman remembers how embarrassed her Mom was about the sheer amount of milk her daughter was drinking.  

“Everything in my life revolves around food. I find comfort in food.”

Canada

Eman’s father had already started the immigration process for the family to move to Canada. He managed an international fiberglass company and already had business in Montreal, Quebec, so they didn’t stay in Iraq for long. 

“I remember coming off the plane and everybody coming at us with covers to cover us up, since it was really cold, and we were from the desert.”

Above: Eman’s bookshelf

Eman found adjusting to Canadian life reasonably easy. The school she went to in Montreal had other recent immigrants, and many were Arabic speakers – people who spoke the same language and looked like her. Eman explains how even though, as Palestinians, they were second class citizens in Kuwait, their quality of life was better there than in Canada.

Her mother had been a kindergarten teacher in Kuwait, and her father a successful businessman. In Canada, they ran a little muffin and coffee shop franchise called “Treats” in the mall. It was hard work, long hours, with very little return.

The move west had the most profound effect on Eman’s mother, sending her into a depression that has never fully recovered from.

Eman will never forget the happy occasion of her family getting their Canadian citizenship in 1993. Eman’s happiness was overshadowed by one section of her citizenship document. For “country of origin, it read “stateless”. She says this still scars her today.

Comedy

From an early age, Eman had wanted to work in entertainment. She grew up watching American shows and felt like nobody on them looked like her.

“I wanted to dispel negative stereotypes. If I saw people who looked like me, they were always awful terrorists – evil people. I feel like when you entertain someone, they will listen to you a lot more than if you are preaching or teaching.” 

Eman started her work on the comedy circuit in 2006.

“Now when I look back, I wish I didn’t get into comedy. It is such a hard unstable career. If I could turn back time, I would be a professional tennis player [laughing].”  (audio below)

Above: Intruding on a stranger’s photoshoot by the Brooklyn Bridge

Identity

Eman finds that people often have trouble figuring out what exactly is her background. They know she is a woman of color, but not much more than that. Once, she encountered a man on the subway who was shouting out people’s ethnic backgrounds. When Eman walked by, he fell completely silent. (audio below)

Above: A necklace from her parents that reads “Eman” in Arabic

Eman doesn’t feel like she has had to deal with a lot of overt discrimination, which she attributes to not being “visibly gay or Muslim looking.” Although she does think her career would be further along if she had been a regular white guy. 

“I remember when I first started doing stand up in Canada, and I wanted to talk about my identity off the top. My boss would be like, ‘maybe you shouldn’t push that right away because it makes people uncomfortable. Make them laugh with light stuff, then get into who you are.’” 

Audio: Eman opening her set at New York Comedy Club
Above: Eman’s wardrobe with a small Palestinian flag

She has had some strange experiences because of her background. Eman remembers once being called “edgy” for mentioning on the radio that she was Palestinian. She also has been heckled because, as she says, “people don’t like what they don’t know.”

“I did get heckled once by a drunk American couple that voted for Trump and called me a terrorist. The audience was really nice to be like, ‘get the fuck out of here!’ [to the hecklers]” (audio below)

Meeting Jess

In 2009 Eman met Jess, who was born in Montreal, Canada to a Peruvian mother and a Canadian father. They became friends on the Canadian comedy circuit. Eman didn’t think of Jess in a sexual way; in fact, she had never really thought of any woman in a sexual way! 

“My curiosity spiked one night when she was at the club; I looked at her in a different light. She has a line in her stand up about being bisexual, and I was like ‘Oh, my God – I’m totally curious!’ It was always on my subconscious. I thought if I were to fool around with a girl it would be her. I didn’t know I would end up marrying her!” (audio below)

New York

Eman knew that New York City was the place to be for standup comedy. Once a year, she would head down to NYC to do a show. It was perfect when she met Jess because she had the same idea about the city. Both Eman and Jess, as comedians, agreed that New York was a place they could both grow as comedians. Besides, Eman had always dreamed of moving to the US. She grew up obsessed with Beverly Hills 90210 and often fantasized about going to an American college by the beach.

They arranged a trip to New York City for a five-month “trial period”, staying in a small studio apartment. This trip was an excellent test for their relationship, and they passed. As Jess remembers,

“It became clear that we were going to do this together, and we were going to do life together.” (audio below)

Marriage

It also became clear that they wanted to move to the US more permanently. They decided to try and get green cards. Their lawyer suggested that Eman apply, and Jess come as her spouse. This complicated Jess’s plan. She already had the ring, and the proposal all planned out! In the end, Jess still proposed but did end up going to New York as Eman’s spouse.

They married at City Hall in Toronto in 2015. Jess’s father had just passed away, so she was a “complete disaster” emotionally, but is thankful they did it for the sake of the green card. 

“In our wedding photos, it looks like Eman is taking me hostage.”

A year and a half later, they had a proper wedding in Montreal [see the above photo]. Jess’s mom helped throw a beautiful wedding party. It was a “real cultural mishmash,” with Jewish traditions, Arabic traditions, mixed in with Peruvian food and culture. They did the hora and the dabka. As Jess remembers,

“We had belly dancers come out at the end, and my mom got down with them. I may have proposed to Eman, but at the wedding, I was full bride.”

They made the official move to NYC in April of 2016. Eman describes New York City as tough, gross, filthy, but also unique, fashionable, and colorful. 

“Originality is so embraced in New York City. You meet such interesting people who probably left where they are from so they could come here and express themselves fully. It is a beautiful liberal bubble where we think Hillary Clinton is president of this town.” (audio below)

Future

Eman tries to perform every single night, sometimes even more than one show in a night. She gets rusty quickly, so being on stage regularly is her way of staying sharp. Eventually, she hopes to have a stable income from comedy (and fame and fortune of course).

Audio: Eman discussing her and Jess’s relationship on stage at the New York Comedy Club

In regards to America’s future, Eman isn’t too sure. She wants to be an idealist and think that liberal-minded people will win in the end.

I want to believe this is the last of ignorance, but I look at the future, and I am so worried. I don’t know if evil wins in the end, but I feel like that is what’s winning right now.”

Update: Since the interview, Eman and Jess have a new daughter (puppy) named Esther Honey, their Crave Comedy Special The El-Salomons: Marriage of Convenience launched and they have been creating awesome cartoons about their lives together over on Instagram.

#FINDINGAMERICAN

To receive updates on the book release and exhibition of “Finding American: Stories of Immigration from all 50 States” please subscribe here. This project is a labor of love and passion. If you would like to support its continuation, it would be greatly appreciated!

© Photos and text by Colin Boyd Shafer | Edited by Kate Kamo McHugh. Quotes have been edited for clarity and brevity.